Eharmony, Esharmony

Frustration. Disappointment. Grrrr.


So here's the thing-I've been on Eharmony for awhile. The truth's out. ;-) I've never (and will never) pay full price for it, and right now I have a coupon code that will get me 6 months for the price of one! It's been quite an interesting experience. Sometimes I love it, other times, I really hate it. I like that it's an intense profile, and the process of matching is pretty cool. I keep getting the guys who say, "well, I'm kinda quiet when you meet me, but after that, I open up." ????? Me??? Profiled and matched with "quiet" guys?? I always thought I needed someone more crazy than me, but maybe not? I was asked to think about what it'd be like to have 2 people like me in a house, and I have to admit....I prob DO need someone that would calm me down, not fight for attention. :-) And it seems to be the majority, so maybe it's right. 


Well, as of right now, I have 914 closed matches. Ones that I thought were just not for me, lived too far away, ones who weren't called to missions, ones that were pretty ugly, or didn't have a picture, ones who loved their dog WAAAy too much, had a job that was just waaaay out there (video gamer, etc) or actually closed me and thought I wasn't the one for them. (What? Come on...I'm amazing!) And, I also have 87 guys who I'm "Waiting for his Response". 87?? Is that even possible or right? I hate it. What is taking them so long to respond?? Are they debating? Are they no longer paying for it because of the economy and they can't respond? Are they just hoping I'll go away if they don't answer?




I keep going back and forth with the idea of Eharmony. Biblical? Normal? Modern way of dating? (FYI-there's nothing in the Bible about internet dating services. :-) I just listened to Nancy Lee DeMoss and she was talking about it.  She thinks we are basically not trusting God when we do things like this. Me taking this into my own hands is saying that I don't think God can handle it, so I need to do the looking. That has been a struggle of mine for awhile. How much am I to do? I can't just sit in my room, hoping that God drops a husband in my lap, can I? I also can't be throwing myself at any guy on any whim. I agree-I try to just hold fast to the truth that God knows what He's doing and He doesn't need my help. It's a very biblical truth. 


I was on a kick recently and I initiated conversation with 6 or 7 guys (well, I sent 5 mult-choice questions to them before they sent them to me) and was excited to hear back. Nuthin. Nada. Now, that was me initiating. Is that wrong? Should I wait for them to send me questions? Is that me pursuing the guy instead of him pursuing me? Nancy said it was. It's not like I was asking him out to dinner or over to my house for the weekend. It was 5 questions. I figure that if I want to stand out in the 5 matches a day he gets in his mailbox, then I'll be the one to write.  


I've had 2 experiences with things actually going further with the people I've talked to. I've been talking to one guy as a friend for over 1 1/2 yrs.  I actually met one of my matches in person. (Don't worry, I was smart and safe about it all.)  But the hard part was this (and a HUGE downfall for eHarmony and long distance dating), we were at two different stages in our relationship. We were more "intimate" (VERY loosely used here) in our conversing through email and very immature with our interaction. I knew so much about him, but didn't know how to talk to him. Didn't know his body language. It's like we had two diff. relationships going on at the same time. I didn't feel like I could talk to him about stuff that we'd say through email because it really felt like it was a different person altogether. Nothing ever came of that relationship, except maybe a friendship. 


So anyhow, I've signed up for the next 3 months and we'll see what happens. I get so frustrated and just sit and wait. 


Goal for this school year- stop sitting around and waiting for life to happen, waiting for dating/marriage to happen, and do things now. Use my singleness. Stop living like life is on hold. Serve God now.

OH yah....I have a blog...

So, I realized, recently, that I have a blog. ;-) And, after some of you have frantically asked me, "So, what did Eric end up doing with the teaching jobs?" I realize that I left you all hanging. And that was from June. It's August. And man, have I have a full summer!

So, Eric- He came and talked to Ann and I about whether or not he should leave and I just sat there. I didn't say anything, I didn't want to talk. I didn't want tears to come. Well, Ann asked if I had any input, and I just teared up and shook my head. Later he came to my room and told me he had made his decision- He was staying. YAY!!!! And then he said, "Don't you ever cry like that again....it's not fair..." So, my school year will be a lot less painful this year with Eric there. It'll be a little easier to not miss Erin so much. Just a little though. It still hasn't hit me that Erin won't be at school this year. It just feels like we are on vacation. It won't hit me until inservice when her room won't be her room. Late nights at school won't be the same. 

My summer was amazing. I got to do so many things and see so many people. I got to spoil my nephew, who now says my name!! He hasn't gotten the "aunt" part yet, but it'll come! And he doesn't run from me in fear anymore. He knows who I am! He just fills me up with so much love. I could just hug him forever. He was chasing Nana with a rubber snake! We just giggled so much together.

{I went on a missions trip to Dominican Republic. That will have to be another post.I know, the suspense is a KILLER!}

I traveled to Ohio to hang out with Joyce who is getting married in September! I'm the M.of H. and we had to get things rolling with the wedding. It's so soon! I also got to see Tiana and Cara while I was in Cleveland. It was such a blessed time. We just picked up where we left off. I really miss those two. Their hearts for our Savior and the love they have for life. And their ability to color-coordinate! (with everyone but me...apparently I didn't get the memo!)

Then, on to Indiana where I had and AMAZING time with my kindred spirit, Rachael. I feel like I'll have to write that up later too. Sorry! Just so much to say about those 10 days. I will give you a picture or two, though!

I'm back to Virginia-as of 5 hrs ago. Volleyball camp doesn't start until August 16, but I want to feel like I'm home before I start school again. My living quarters are  still a DISASTER so I want to get that all set up and figured out. Things to go up in the attic, on walls, under the bed, etc.

I WILL try to be better at this. I don't know how many actually read this anyhow. BUT I'll do it for Amy, Tiana, Cara, Ashley and Kristin!

Men in Uniform

My friends and I always joke about how good guys look in uniform. We admire (to be stated lightly) the uniformed men that walk in the school to pick up their kids from school. We see them everywhere. The store, the metro, Baskin Robbins-it goes with where we live. It's one of the "curses" of living 20 mins from the nation's capital and the bases for every military branch. We talk about wanting to date/marry a man in uniform.


(This picture is of a man who, as soon as he got on the Metro, pulled out his Bible, notebook and highlighter and dug into God's Word. I just had to get a picture. This totally rocked my world.)

I've changed my mind. Oh, they still look AMAZING in their uniforms. But I don't want to marry one.

Over the last month, I've sat at my computer and cried for friends who have lost their loves. Their "men in uniform". It just makes my heart ACHE to read about a girl, Ashley Tack,  losing her fiancée to a STUPID suicide bomber who was dressed up like a woman walking around the marketplace. And Jake Leicht, a kid I did summer camp and missions trips with, who never had his soap, towels or ANYTHING that one would need for camp, died after they drove over a bomb in the road. Previously he had gone through 2 years of physical therapy and begged to be allowed to go back and serve his country. And he's gone. 

I just ache for their families. For their loves. For all they have had to go through, wondering if they are still alive, wondering when they aren't going to be anymore. Hearing the news that they aren't. Getting that knock on the door. It didn't really affect or bother me before. I was in western PA and had nothing connecting me to the war. And now, living in NOVA, having so many students with parents in uniform, losing friends because of being transferred to another base, having friends suffer because their friends are being sent to other locations, I'm connected now. This war is affecting me.

Lord,  I want to thank You for the strength you are giving these families. Please hold Ashley close to You. Help her know that You will never let go. Please hold and protect and comfort all the families that have lost and will lose, every day, one of their loves.

One of the men in uniform.

And it's only 9:55am

I don't know when I've felt such an influx of emotions in such a short amount of time. I know it's not abnormal, and people go through stuff all the time.

It's just been a long time since it's happened to me. A long time since my emotions have been thrown for a loop.

High-I finished ALL MY GRADES! No more red pen until September! No more entering grades into the computer!

Low-Last night I was doing something and it made me realize how much things are going to change in the next 12 days. Thinking back through all the memories and the great times Erin and I've had over the last 3 years brings so many laughs...and tears. It's going to end. We'll still be great friends, but there won't be the 11pm ice cream runs, the themed movie marathons and dinners, the sit around all Saturday and do nothing together just because we can, etc. I was up pretty late-1am and then couldn't get to sleep.

High- This morning is so exciting because it's the LAST MONDAY of the school year! I came to school charged and ready (even though I'm on little sleep). Tonight I'm going out to Bonefish grill with Erin, Jo Anne and Kim. They are forcing me to try good fish. I'm not too excited. ;-) It'll be a fun time together. A last hoorah.

Low/High-Then, I had my end of the year evaluation with the principal and assistant principal. I was up and down with that one- wasn't sure what to expect. I thought it was after school today so I was taken off guard when they came to my room to get me. It went really well-I got mostly 5s! I know there are a ton of areas I need to work on, hence the 4s, but it's a growing thing. They said they are really pleased with what I'm doing and how the things I do don't go unnoticed. I just try to do my part and extra-because I don't have a full classroom so I do have that extra time and less responsibilities in certain areas. I'm thankful that God has given me a servant's heart. It's so easy for me to help and I know it's a gift. Nothing I've done to earn it.

Low- VERY LOW- Eric texted me last night and asked me to pray about a HUGE decision that he has to make. Ok, sure. I'd love to pray. Anything for him. Then today, while I'm teaching a class, he hands me a "Reference Evaluation for Amherst School", and all he says is that we'll talk about it later. WHAT. How can he do that? How can he leave me here with this feeling in the pit of my stomach. How can he hand ME a reference form that will help him get a job at ANOTHER school. I wanted to throw up. I still do. I don't want to fill it out. Anytime I think about it, I get sick. I don't want to talk to him about it. He already knows what I think and what I'm going to say.

How do I be supportive? How do I let ANOTHER best friend go this year?

God, what are You doing?

Tonight I had a such a good night.

Let me back up to Thursday. At choir/orchestra practice, Alan told me he wanted to talk to me. Fidel and Altagracia Lorenza are here, visiting from the Dominican Republic and are the directors of Operation Christmas Child in the D.R. They come in May to talk to churches and visit with the relay teams that work so hard to collect boxes and to organize distribution. Alan and Heidi went on a distribution trip with OCC and have been totally changed by it. I REALLY want to go on a trip. I'm going to get more involved this year so I might get a chance to go on a trip in the future.
ANYHOW... Alan invited me to a cookout at their house with the team of distributors so I could talk to Altagracia and Fidel a little more. Ya see, Altagracia, who is such an amazing lady, is the principal of a school in D.R.....and I made the "mistake" of telling Alan how much I want to get overseas and teach. I think he's made it his goal to get me on the mission field. He asked me on Thursday,  "What do you think about taking a year's sabbatical and going to live with the Lorenzos in DR and we'll make sure your transportation is taken care of and we'll get support going for some spending money."  What do I think??????? PACK MY BAGS!

What do I think? I think that it'd be unbelievable. A dream come true. My ultimate dream is to be bilingual and to just let Spanish flow like a river out of my mouth. I'd love to be surrounded by Latinos. I'd love to eat beans and rice and amazing fruit. I think it'd be great to shake my life up a little. I also think that I have a ton of loans. I need more than just spending money-I need loan payment money. I need to be able to continue on things in the U.S. while I'm working out of country. I think that I don't know enough Spanish to survive.

When I got in the house, Fidel asked if my luggage was packed. :-) I talked to Altagracia a lot about the school. K-7 come to school in the AM. 8-12 come in the afternoon. Some classes have up to 37 in them. 37 kids in a classroom!! In a SPANISH speaking classroom where things are falling apart and they need so much. I'm actually laminating things for her so she can use them for years to come. It's so little but it's something. It's something that I and CRCS can give.

I mentioned to Alan about how I'd love to go but I have school loans and how I'd have to make that much a month to be able to go. He told me to figure that amount out and let him know.  ?  ?  ? He then proceeded to tell me that he already has someone who has stepped up to the plate and would be willing to take care of that while I'm gone.     WHAT?!?!?!?   I was in such disbelief that I didn't know what to say. I just kinda laughed it off and he reassured me how serious he was. Someone wants to pay my loans while I go overseas. How unreal. How amazing. How....wow. He said he'd talk to Pastor about making sure I'd get my job back if I left for a year to do this and how he's already planting that seed. He's determined to get my train rolling. He also said he didn't want me to get married yet because then I wouldn't be free to do everything he wants to see me do.

Lord, you are in control. You are blowing my mind right now. I need to be intentional with my life to make this happen. Please open the doors and make me trust enough to go through so I don't have regrets and so I don't miss out on Your amazing blessings and work that I can do for You.

Viva Republica Dominicana!

Goulash, hodgepodge, mix-match

I feel like there's such a load of things that I want to write. I feel like I could just write forever. And yet, I don't know where to start. 


Some of the things I want to write about aren't really things that I should write about here. I should save it all for the journal. Other things are just stupid and no one wants to know about them. So I won't write those either. Here are a few snippets I will include.


Cherisea Lenea Janica Forrest Riley came for a LONG weekend and I loved every minute of it. She helped at school, got toasted at Field Day, endured a crush by an 8th grader and survived a volleyball bowling party.  She came and ran a 5K in D.C. I'm so proud of her. If she doesn't get into the grad school, she might just move here. She loved it. I would love it. I hated watching her leave. 


We had an amazing volleyball sleepover. I love those girls and can't wait for the season to start again.


Soccer season is over. I was titled the "assistant coach" but really, I drove the van and cheered for the girls like crazy. And...I kept Eric in line. I loved it.


School's coming to an end! 22 school days! 13 or so for the 8th grade. I can't believe it.


News on the move- I'm doing it! I told the mom, Bitsy, that I'll be moving in the basement of their house and she's excited. Cathy and Caleb think it's cool too. Caleb, the 3rd grader, especially. "Where will Ms. Peffer go when we go on vacation?"  Bitsy: "Well, she'll be here, or she'll visit her parents."  C: "She could come with us!"
Yesterday when I saw him for the first time knowing, he checks in at extended care and says, "Hello Spanish teacher who's going to live in my basement..." and walks away. Walks away to a classmate and converses for a little bit. The classmate looks back and forth from me to Caleb. He then walks over to me and asks "Is it true? Are you moving in with Caleb?" "Ummm...yes."  "Why? You don't have a house?" "Well, Ms. Craig is moving so I need a place to stay."  "Oh. I thought Caleb was lying." "Nope. It's true."   Then Caleb proceeds to tell about 3 or 4 other kids. All I can do is laugh. It's going to be awkward for awhile.


As Caleb walks into my classroom today, he says, "Can I call you Roomie?" :-() uhhhhh..... "No! Not yet.." (I should have said, um, never.)    He is also telling all the teachers that I'm going to bring him to school. We'll watch the novelty wear off when I'm the one yelling up the stairs, "5 seconds and the car's leaving!!!" 


I think it's going to be a good thing. A great thing for both of us.




I think that's all the rambling I'll tonight. Gotta get in the Word. Things to pray about.  Way past bedtime. 

A smile and a great laugh

I just got done with having a great laugh. Not a laugh that last for hours or one that could be heard for miles, but one that was the total all of my feeling inside.
I'm happy. tickled pink. overjoyed. touched.


See, there's this guy that I've been talking to for over a year now. We've had the talk about "what's going on here" and he's declared that he and God have talked, and they've decided that we're just to be friends.


Ok, sure. That's fine. I'm going to keep talking to him, build the friendship and see what happens.


He's an EMT and one time I accidentally called the ambulance, 'Blance. So, I'm trying to get the nickname to stick. I told him that if he used it, everyone else would catch on.


Well, today I got a message on my wall that said, "Check out my status. You'd be proud!"


So, I did.


Which was followed by that laugh  I was talking about. It said, "Livin' the dream today! Otherwise known as working on the 'blance!


Yessssss! 


I'm still smiling. 

On the Up and Up!

It's been awhile...but I haven't been in that funk that WHOLE time. Things are getting better...

I've decided that there's no use for me to sit and sulk about us not going to Peru. I was and still am really disappointed. I ache to see those kids again and to revisit the places I made memories the first time. But I know that the kids wouldn't be as excited as I think they should be and different people would be there and it just wouldn't be the same.

I got a text from Paul asking me if I wanted my name on the list for Dominican Republic. Ummmmm...um......SIGN ME UP! [........send] So, here I go! I'm on the list for the DR! I'm going to an ISLAND!!! Where they speak Spanish! I'll get another stamp in my passport!  And, I'll be traveling with some of the most amazing people ever. Some suggested I go to Peru by myself. But 3/4 of the trip I was looking forward to was the people I'd be going with. I love ministering with these people-Amy, Seth, Aaron, Paul, Lillian (oh I hope!)  Chris, and other people that I just can't remember. I wish the bros were goin'. That's kinda a bummer. A really big bummer.

I got my day off on Wed so Amy and I hit the city! We did a TON of things in one day. Check out the facebook page for pictures of us with famous (wax) people! I loved having her here. It's not fair that my sister lives so far away. She should probably come visit again. We had some great talks. Wish I wasn't so busy with work that we could have talked more. Sisters need gab time! Sisters need "dig deep into the heart" time. Didn't get deep enough in my opinion, but maybe next time... :-)

Spring Break is coming up soon! That makes ANY one feel like things are on the up and up! Erin and I might be heading to CANADA! (the Olympics inspired us!) Well, to Niagara Falls, Canadian style. If you ask any Canadian, Niagara Falls really isn't Canada.  We'll see what happens! It might just be all week at home, which is totally fine with me.

Back to life...and I gotta write an email.... ;-)

A Handful of Let Downs, Anyone?

If I could be a color, it might just be blue.

This last couple of weeks have been a series of letdowns. Bummers. Things that haven't made me very happy. Made me quite sad, actually. To the point of tears. Aches. Disappointment.

 
For the past year, we've been talking about our next international missions trip-to the land of my heart-Peru. It's been 4 years since I've been there. It's been talked about, and we've been hoping and planning and dreaming about this trip. I told my kids we were coming. And now we aren't going. I know the great people in charge are being responsible and did so much research and know what they're doing. But that doesn't help the ache. It doesn't help the letdown. It doesn't help me get back to my kids. And friends. And the passion that's burning in my heart to go back. Instead of Peru they are planning a trip to Dominican Republic. Cool. Great. Fun! Get to work and serve God! I love it! I'm glad they aren't just giving up and not doing anything.

But it's not Peru.

So I was thinking, Hey! Let's drive with Erin to California when she moves! How amazing would THAT be to drive across country this summer! A dream coming true. A great way to end our time together. A kinda longtime farewell to a great friend and an amazing 3 year time together as best friends.

Nope. No trip. We talked about it as if it's a possibility. Like it would work. And I think that's what has me most bummed. If you aren't sure it's possible, then don't act as if it's going to be a for sure thing. Don't get my hopes up and then shoot them down. Talk about it as if it might work, and then confirm. Not the other way around. So yep. Not doing THAT this summer.

Today I put in a request for a day off when Amy comes on her Spring Break. WOOHOOOOO. I can't wait until she gets here. It'll be some much needed sister time. But when I was in the office, the secretaries were giving me a hard time about other people taking off that day and they didn't know if they could get a sub. IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM! Hire more subs!!! I have personal days, so I'm going to use them. Don't make ME feel bad about asking for time off. DON'T put that guilt on me!

Ugh.

Anything else want to be a bummer for me? I wonder what else will disappoint me. What else WON'T happen? What else will rob me of joy?

One liners from the Classroom

3rd Grade boy: "Ms. Craig, today's Ash Wednesday."
"What are you giving up?"
"My brother."

1st Grade fashionista: "Ms. Señorita Peffer, I love the ribbon in your hair. You always wear matching stuff. Everytime before I come to Spanish class, I stop and think, 'I wonder what Ms.Señorita Peffer is wearing today!"
"You do not!"
"Yes, I do!"
"You're unbelievable."

8th Grade class: "Ms. Peffer, why were you mad at us the other day?"
Me: "Oh, you remember that huh? That was before the snowstorm. That was a long time ago."
"Yah, but you wouldn't let the sub give us candy. She had candy for us!"
(everyone always remembers when they're denied candy, but NO one remembers the homework assignment)

Kindergartner: "Woah Ms. Peffer. Your sweater looks SOFT!!! (proceeds to feel my sweater...across my chest)
"WOAH!" and grab his hand and guide him into the classroom.

Kindergartner, greeting me as he's walking into the middle school for computer: "Hi Sweetie!!"

8th Grade
Me: "You're suppose to be working. The answers are in your book. Why isn't your book open?"
Boy: "I have x-ray vision."
Me: "Ummmmmmmmm..........I hope not......(as I almost felt the need to cover myself)
Boy: "Uhh...uhh.... NO! Ms. Peffer! For my book, only for my book..."
Me: "Man, you're turning red!"
Boy: "tsk...I can't turn red, I'm black!"
His best friend: "yah...you're red man...."
Girl: "Who knows what ELSE he'd do with it..."

Me: "man, she's been absent for a long time. I wonder if she's boycotting school."
Boy: "I'd get in so much trouble for tryi.....
Me: "  NO! She's not really...
Girl: "Oh my word. She's probably sick. Come on Mickey!"

And the best of today....
   I've sent the 8th grade back to the middle school while I grabbed my computer and jacket. RIGHT as I step outside, I see the 8th grader who always gets caught pick up a clump of snow.

I yell across the parking lot, "1 DEMERIT!!!"
And to myself, " Yesssss! Thank you Lord!"

Interesting Proposition

So today I was approached by a mom/friend/volleyball assistant with a proposition. 


An offer.


She started off by saying, I don't even know why I'm telling you this, or why I'm even bringing this up, but it's been on my heart and I need to say this. I won't bring it up again unless you bring it up, so here it goes.


"I have a finished basement that I'm not really using. I know you need a place to stay in June for the next year. It would benefit me immensely. I wouldn't charge you rent, but what I would ask is that you take my son (9) and daughter (13) to school everyday (my school). That way I could earn overtime for time off. I could collect at least 4 weeks of leave time if you did that all year. And that's the world to me."


---did you catch that? 


          I WOULDN'T CHARGE YOU RENT.


Is this a dream come true?? Is this God's way of providing for me to be able to pay my loans off quicker so I can get to the mission field? I would be saving $533 a month. That's over $6,000 I could save and put it on my loans. WHAT?!??!! 


It means that I would have to condense and sell things or put things in storage (or in my parents house.... :-) because right now, my stuff can furnish a HOUSE. There's a ton of stuff I have that I don't need anyhow.  It means living further away from school, but not any further than before.  I'd be living with a single divorced mother and her two great kids who I've known and taught for the past 2 years. Her daughter is me when I was her age. I've had the desire to mentor her since I met her. This could be such a positive in her life. And in mine. 


And I'd have a place to go without needing to look. Do you understand that peace that I'd love to have? I'd be able to move stuff gradually if I wanted to. I could travel across the country with Erin as she moves to California before the end of June. How amazing would THAT be? Such a crazy thing! Something I've always wanted to do!!!! We'd cover 13 states-7 states that I've never been to! WOAHH!


We'd have to set boundaries and all that. Obviously. I'd have to figure out how I'd fit with a family of 3. A single divorced mother and her two great kids. Not a 26 yr old's dream life, or normal life, but there's not really that's normal about me and my life. 


Ahhhhh!!!! Erin pointed out that God has provided us BOTH with a free living possibility. We thought we were left devastated and now we have this.

Stay tuned....

The right thing at the wrong time...is still wrong.

I had it all planned. 


I was going to leave this school, move with Erin to Indianapolis, get an amazing job, be 2 hours from Rach, find myself a cowboy and life would be grand.


And then, I asked God what He thought I should do. His plan was different than my plan. Go figure. 


Let's back up a little. Erin and her parents spent Christmas break looking for houses that her parents could buy, we'd pay rent, and move to Indiana.  Cost of living is less, guys in Indiana want to get married, and we'd be out of the fast paced city life we have now. They found great houses and put offers in. All the offers fell through. 


I was telling people about my move and the first question would be, 
"oh so you have a job there?"  
"well, no...."
"So you're going without having a job?"
"Well, in the teaching world, the window is really small, and the jobs aren't available right now."
"ohh....hmmmm"
I didn't care what they were saying. I was still going to move. I didn't forget what they said, I just kept on going.


And then every day on the middle school news channel, they were reporting about the unemployment rate and how the lines are so long and high schoolers can't get high school jobs because middle class workers were taking the jobs at McDonald's. 


Then we got our intent forms in our boxes. Ughhh. The dreaded intent forms. I was still undecided. Erin's sure she's to go. I was going along with her. I mean, there are things that I could SURELY do without, but there were things that were tugging at my heart. Things that I didn't know if I could let go. 


Jo Anne (elementary admin) pulled me into her room to talk to me about my intent form. She told me she hadn't feltl the need to talk to anyone in the last 3 yrs about their intent but she wanted to talk to me.  She really didn't want me to leave.  I have felt, before then, that if I was to leave that I would be easily replaced, that I was invaluable. She took the time to tell me my strengths and about the ministry and impact she saw that I have and have had with the students. She didn't think my ministry was done here yet. I told her all the things that I dreaded leaving-
(1) the 7th graders whom I LOVE and would have them in History (who were my 5th graders the first year here)
(2) the volleyball team which I treasure. We have to defend our championship!
(3) the chance that I have to teach Spanish. I'd never really get that anywhere else. I'm not bilingual. I just LOVE the language and I love to pass the love onto the children. And they are loving it. And learning it.  I even have one kid telling his mom, "I love Mondays. I get to see Senorita Peffer 2 times on Monday."
(4) Being involved with the Middle Schoolers and working with the staff there. 


I'm crying and she's says to me, "Abby, you can stay. You realize that? You can stay."


A HUGE weight was lifted off my shoulders. I can stay. I could stay.


Then I went into Eric's empty office and bawled my eyes out. And then, only then, did I decide to ask God what He wanted me to do. I was afraid to ask Him because I knew His answer and I didn't want His answer. I don't want to leave Erin.  I don't want to have a best friend leave and I have to stay. 


I turned my intent form in----with a check on yes, I'm staying.


I then had to tell Erin. OH.MY.WORD.   That was NOT fun. God gave me the words, let her show me the grace I needed and after a couple of awkward days we talked it out and life is good.

Snow Days, PLURAL!

So I've just made history. Okay, well I didn't make history, but I lived through history! Virginia hasn't had this much snow in over 100 years. Getting snow like this is unheard of. I haven't been to school since Thursday of last week. LAST week. We've had 5 snow days in a row and Friday looks iffy. We are to have our Black History Celebration on Friday, so it really just depends if Mr. Jones wants to deal with the wrath of the parent who has planned this whole celebration.  


It's been a continual aloud declaration of "we don't have school tomorrow!" to help us realize how crazy this whole thing is. Now I'm not surprised with the phone chain call to tell us about tomorrow's cancellation. My body TOTALLY knows how much snow is outside. I've been shoveling all week.  Erin even went out on her roof and cleaned it off so it wouldn't collapse. Nice of the landlady to tell us to check...but didn't give us a method of fixing it.


The snow is absolutely breathtaking. the view is amazing. The layers of snow are unbelievable. The crystals are sparkling under the light of the moon.


I've enjoyed movies, cleaned my room, read an entire book, painted my toenails (blue and orange to boot!), went to the mall in between the dumpings of snow because cabin fever is REALLY grabbing us, gotten a lot of sleep and have played a little Wii. I'm actually disappointed in our Wii playing. Granted, I don't have a teenage boy living here, so it's understandable, but I really need to get my money's worth with my new toy! 


Now we have school scheduled for Presidents Day which is totally fine with me. It'll make planning a lot easier.


Friday night Erin and I are going over to friends house to celebrate the Opening Ceremony of the Winter Olympics. I love watching iceskating! Kristi Yamaguichi is my hero! Yah, I know, she's not skating anymore, but I still adore her and loved watching her when I was little. Now all the girls who are skating seem sooooo little! Let's see what happens in Canada! Go Team USA!

SNOW DAY!

This snow storm has been named Epic. The maps show it as a paralyzing storm. We are predicted to get the minimum of 16 inches and probably closer to 24. All the schools were cancelling yesterday and there wasn't a snowflake in the air! We were bugging Harold about cancelling school and he was being so goofy about it. We've already had a day with no morning extended care (YAY!) and a 2 hr delay on Wed. It's been a nice week! Harold finally cancelled and we knew by 630pm Thursday. It's so nice that we knew before 5am. The snow has been falling since 10 am and starting sticking around 4pm. Erin and I decided we needed to go outside and get shoveling. Last blizzard, right before Christmas, we didn't shovel until it stopped and we TOTALLY regretted it. So, we headed out to attack the snow. I got an AMAZING snow shovel from dad for Christmas and it's the best gift I got. 2 hours and a snowman later, it still looked like we hadn't done a thing. We could have just stayed out there all night without stopping and the driveway would never be clear. It's unbelievable! It's coming down at like 2 to 3 inches an hour. The snow plows have not stopped clearing the roads. 


Our cars have mo-hawks. Our snowman is super cute.  AND he's wearing huge sunglasses. I don't have pictures, but I will soon. The snow turned into a sleety type and it was hurting so we came in. We are thawing out and enjoying the ambiance of candles and overstuffed blankets. 


I think we are heading back out to shovel. AGAIN. We looked out and it looks like we didn't do A THING! Where's the boyfriend when we need him??


I'm pretty sure that we've had more snow than PA. :-)

I Keep Tearing Up...

All through the morning I have been tearing up.

And it's all about the same thing-We need to do something for Haiti. Yes, many countries have things go wrong and I haven't felt so compelled as I have now to do something. The tsunami was bad, but it didn't call me to action. It didn't hurt my heart as much as it should/could have. But this one, this one is getting me.

I just read Kristin's blog about my youth group at home. They raised  $1200 in one night of youth group. Unbelievable. Tears.

One of my 8th grade students is from Haiti. His brother is in 6th grade and his sister is in my 1st grade Spanish class. They got a call from the grandparents yesterday and reported that they were okay, but he hasn't heard from any other family members that are there. Cousins, Aunts and Uncles, are somewhere in the country of Haiti.

To be so far away and be in that constant fear is unreal. Tears.

We need to do something. God's timing is perfect because we had a chapel message yesterday about "taking the shot". About how a 9 year old kid decided to take a shot, actually, 2,057 freethrow shots, to raise money to support 8 World Vision kids for 2 years. He was 9. HE didn't make all of those shots. But it wasn't about making the shot. It was about taking the shot. Tears.

All of the kids in my school heard this message and they are pumped. They want to do something.

And now we have something to do it for.  We can't let the fire die but we have to figure out what to do. What will work? What can elementary kids do? 3rd graders were brainstorming-what can I do well? What do I have a passion for? They want to be sponsored for how many pages they read, or how many baskets they can make, or tackles or whatever else they can think of.

Please be in prayer, first of all, for the Adriens. And for everyone else in Haiti.

2nd, please pray that we figure out the best way to do something. Anything.